Haters Hurt When They Judge You
Judging others isn’t just a diversion. It’s toxic to you and everyone around you. Judging others is similar to gossiping. It makes others think less of you. You’ll also find that the harder you are on other people, the harder you’ll be toward yourself.
Judging others is a way of controlling your environment, but the negative repercussions make it a poor life strategy.
What do you gain by judging others?
See the consequences of judging others:
- It’s a huge waste of time. Judging others accomplishes nothing. You could spend that time exercising, reading, listening to music, supporting a friend, or taking a nap.
- People don’t trust you. If you’re informing others around you of your negative judgements, they won’t trust you in the future. They know it’s only a matter of time before you judge them, too.
- It makes you look bad. It’s poor form to criticize others behind their back. Even if you’re complaining about the quality of someone’s lawn, it’s still being negative and unpleasant. Well-adjusted people avoid spontaneously spouting negative opinions.
- You open yourself up to judgement from others. When you judge people, they feel justified in judging you, too. Interestingly, you probably wouldn’t appreciate that very much! You’re likely to be treated in the same way you treat others.
- Judging others negatively impacts your mood. You don’t feel better for long after you judge someone else. You’re acting on a negative impulse, which leads to a negative outcome and you carry that with you wherever you go.
- You’re really just trying to protect your ego. The primary reason for judging others is elevating yourself. It’s easier to drag someone else down than it is to put in the work to make yourself a better person. Spend your time enhancing your life, rather than trying to bring others down.
- Being hard on others is also being hard on yourself. Being critical of others leads to being critical of yourself. Your brain has a hard time distinguishing between being critical of other people and being critical of yourself. It will look for things to criticize if that’s what you teach it to do.
- Judgement can be a form of selfishness. We tend to dislike those that have things we want but don’t have. We want it for ourselves, and we don’t want others to have it. This is because it shines a light on the fact that we’ve failed to attain it. Let others enjoy the rewards of their hard work.
- You’re avoiding reality. Many of the things you dislike in others are things that you dislike about yourself. It’s easier to project these negative qualities out onto other people and acknowledge them at a distance. It’s a way of hiding from yourself.
Judging others hurts you more than it hurts them. It damages your standing with other people. You make enemies. You think less of yourself. And it’s all negative.
Rather than judge other people, make the necessary changes to enhance the aspects of your life that you’re dissatisfied with. Focus on positive changes to yourself and your own life, and life will become more fulfilling for you.